Friday, October 7, 2016

Reacting Badly


Remember Asia?

I had a feeling I'd be running into her again. Unfortunately.

It was "my" prep period for the day. The math teacher had a meeting, so they needed someone to cover. He explained what I needed to do. Easy enough. Then Asia walked in.

And reacted badly.

The teacher talked her back into the room. He got the students started, and then he took off for his meeting.

Asia... Well, I was the enemy now, so she was going to resist me. No matter what. And a class I thought might go well...

(Add in other students who were now going to do what they wanted while I was doing battle. And technology that wouldn't cooperate. It was a hard, hard period.)

At one point I pulled Asia outside to have a chat. She told me that I hated her because she's half black. I told her I had no such opinion of her. I thought we could be friends. But I needed her help. I needed her to follow directions so we could get through the lesson.

She tried, I think. And things got better for a time. But she seems to be incapable of sitting still.

When she needed to use the restroom while her friend needed a health office pass...

I talked to their teacher later. I let him know what happened. And he told me that they are tracking her behavior, trying to modify it.

The next day I saw Asia across the way. She saw me. And from that distance, I could hear her reaction to me. "That's the sub that hates me. She got me in trouble."

Deep sigh. At least I know she's got issues. And the school is attempting to work with her.

28 comments:

  1. It's good they are trying to help rather than just control her. Of course, you still have to deal with her in the meantime.

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  2. She must have thought that you would be banned from school grounds for your treatment of her last time (lol). But if she has issues, she probably has a persecution complex. She might not ever believe an adult could be on her side.

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  3. I guess I should say that it is good they are working with her. But I think that is so much what is wrong with these precious little children of today. We need to give them consequences!! And make them suffer a bit for their actions. Just my 'old lady' opinion!

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    1. She's the type that would only get her back up if you went at her hard. Hopefully she'll grow out of it.

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  4. What year is Asia? Are you doomed to have many more encounters for her or will she be graduating perhaps this year?

    betty

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  5. Yikes. I hope the school can work with her and help her.

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  6. I guess there always has to be at least one student who teachers can't quite reason with, right? And, of course, it's always everyone's fault BUT that student's in her mind!

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    1. One? *laughs hysterically* There are a few. Usually they end up in different placements because there's no reasoning with them.

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  7. Whatever happened to Asia to bring her to this point must have been big. Hope the school interventions will be enough.
    You are amazing, Liz.

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    1. Yes, true. And I won't have any idea what those things are. Nor are they any of my business.

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  8. A sad situation all around, because I sense that Asia may be in a way different place right now (physically and emotionally) if her life situation had been different. You did reach out to her - if that matters or not, in the long run, remains to be seen I hope she does end up taking the lifeline you have offered. Alana ramblinwitham.blogspot.com

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    1. Probably not. She doesn't believe that I don't hate her. Although, I think that's mostly projection...

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  9. That sounds frustrating. Too bad you couldn't just say " no, I hate you because you're a bitch". I would never be a good teacher...

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    1. LOL. That's a more true statement than my hating her for her racial makeup. (I'm in the wrong area if I did judge a student solely on their racial makeup.)

      But, hate is one of those emotions that's really a waste of energy. I may dread dealing with certain students, but I don't hate them. I wish them well. I just hope that they're well someplace else.

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  10. There are lots of way to get kids to do that which give 'em the shits, but there are far fewer when you are a sub. Hang in there. At least you don't have to teach her every day.

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    1. Yup. Of course, I found something she hates--me making her work outside. And that's something I can do.

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  11. I can only echo Birgit's sentiment. Good work, my dear, and thank you for doing it.

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    1. There are some days when I would so love to say something like that.

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  12. It's very difficult, isn't it? I have 2 nieces who are also "half black" and, while understand their anger and outrage in some areas, there are also times when I think they need to reconsider exactly what it is upsetting them. They don't always do that.

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    1. At that school, she is not in the minority. There are many students of all sorts of ethnic backgrounds. But "it's because I'm black, isn't it?" or "it's because I'm Mexican, isn't it?" is a default complaint whenever they're called out on some misbehavior.

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  13. I think this student will have better relationships with you and those around her (and I'm sure there are others) when she realizes it's a reflection of low self-esteem to play the victim to manipulate others.

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    1. Yes. And hopefully she'll learn this. She's only 14, so there's still time.

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  14. My hat is off to you. I could never deal with kids all day. Be well!

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    1. Most kids aren't like this. Although, the ones who are tend to be grouped together in certain classes...

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  15. Ahhh a handful. Yes, at least they're aware and trying to work on the problem. Hopefully they'll get through to her one day.

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  16. *sigh* I kind of feel bad for her. Clearly she is a handful and you, it sounds like, handled the situation well. I just think maybe she doesn't trust adults? … Or like something is going on to cause the misbehavior… But I'm not a teacher or counselor or even child psychologist, so I really don't know. I just hope things work out for her. It sounds like she has plenty of people on her side trying to help her. Good for you for not taking her attitude personally!

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    1. Perhaps. I don't know. I met her case carrier the other day, and it sounds like she has the same issues with everybody. (Meeting her case carrier was a coincidence of subbing, not something that I set out to do.)

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