The Get-Out-of-the-Test-Free Card

Thursday. Sophomore math. Third period.

I had been in the class since Tuesday as the teacher had some foot injury that meant he couldn't put any weight on it. I was supposed to start Monday, but I stayed home with a cold. 

On Tuesday, the students got the study guide for Thursday's test. (Block schedule. The classes meet every other day.) They had some time to work on it, and then Mr. Y, the co-teacher, went over the problems so the students knew how to do them. (They were studying solving quadratic equations.) 

Then Wednesday happened. (If you haven't seen yesterday's post, you might want to check it out.) 

As first period ended and third period began, I was not surprised at the arrival of the principal, an assistant principal, and three counselors. Because, you see, the student had been in this class, and their passing would be very noticeable. 

(The student sat in the back of the room, so maybe some of them wouldn't have noticed. But one tends to at least have a passing acquaintance with the students in one's classes.)

I mean, this is when it would hit you, if you didn't have the student in another class before this. And three girls huddled in the middle of the room, one bawling while two others held her. Mr. Y found the tissue and made sure to distribute it. 

The principal talked about where the students could go for support. There's a whole system in place currently. The others said a few words. And then, when none of the students had anything to say, they left. 

Test time? Nah. Mr. Y wasn't going to make them take a test. Not now. 

While some of the students weren't close with the student who was now gone, some were. And, it just wasn't the day for it. 

Many of the students spent the period on their phones. Some talked. Some cried. I assume some were avoiding thinking about it. I understand. 

After class, Mr. Y wondered about when he'd give the test. I advocated for just cancelling it for them. (All the other classes took it.) Giving it the next week would throw third period off the same schedule as the rest of the classes. They'd be a day behind. 

(And, it was hard for Mr. Y as well. The previous class he sat with the student and talked to them for a bit. Later, before I left school on Tuesday, Mr. Y told me the student seemed off that day.)

Ultimately, Mr. Y will discuss this with Mr. R (the teacher I was subbing for), and they'll make that decision. (It'll hit Mr. R hard, too. All the teachers who had that student are feeling this.) 

It's such a weird time. I think missing one test won't make all that much difference in the grand scheme of things. 

Tear Jerker

It was an 11th grade special ed English class. They were reading Of Mice and Men. Or, actually, their teacher was reading it aloud to them.

The lesson plan called for the instructional aide to read the last chapter. When she stumbled over a couple words, telling the class she wasn't used to reading aloud, I got the hint that the teacher usually did the reading. So, I asked if she would prefer it if I read the last chapter to them.

I don't know if I've ever actually read that chapter before. I've been in classes that were studying it, so I knew what was coming.

I read. They sort of followed along. And most of them knew what was coming as well.

Perhaps it was the anticipation. Perhaps I was just overly tired. But I felt myself tearing up. And I tried to hold it in.

I did an admirable job... for a while. And then I lost it.

The instructional aide had to jump in and finish the chapter for them while I went in search of a tissue. And hoped my makeup wasn't running.

How embarrassing.

I don't cry in front of classes. They can do their worst to me. I hold on to it until I'm alone in the room or at home by myself. But this time I just couldn't hold it together.

Ah well...