Keeping an Eye on Him

Last Friday was my last day in the special ed math/history class. It was also assembly day. Ugh. 

Third period. This is the same group I wrote about yesterday. 

First, I passed out leis to the kiddos who had made the honor roll last semester (had a GPA of 3.0 or higher). That was basically the whole class except for the two students who managed to disappear on the way to the counselors the previous class. 

Before we left, I questioned Elian on what had happened. I mean, it wasn't like it was a distance, but somehow he disappeared. He hemmed and hawed, but he didn't have a great reason for vanishing. I pointed out that he missed his chance to register for classes. He said he'd already done it. 

We headed out to the gym for the dreaded assembly. But this time, I was going to keep an eye on Elian. (The girl who disappeared the previous day was absent.) 

And I did, up until we were almost at the gym. My mind wandered, and I took my eye off Elian. And he was gone.

Crap!

I backtracked, looking around. I was just about to talk to one of the security personnel when Elian appeared. Phew. 

They weren't letting us into the gym yet. I knew where Elian was, but the rest of the class wasn't in sight. Ms. S said she'd seen them, but she didn't see them anymore. 

Me: "Yeah, but I trust them."

And sure enough, when we finally got let into the gym and found the section where the sophomores were supposed to sit, the entire rest of the class was sitting there, together. 

My trust wasn't misplaced. 

Elian? I'm not sure where he got to, but I did see him enter the gym. So, at least he was nominally where he was supposed to be. 

After the assembly, the rest of the class got back to the classroom in a timely manner. Elian? He took his time, but he eventually returned. 

It's too bad my time with them was over. I had just gotten to the point where Elian was on my radar. Although, considering how many days he had been absent, that might not have been much of a consequence for Elian. 

Tortilla Slap

The first day of school. And I began a long-term in a seventh grade science class. 

In our district, seventh grade is the beginning of middle school. (I know some districts begin middle school with sixth grade. That's why I'm being specific.) And as such, the seventh graders are brand new to the school.

So, the school decided to make the first day of school a kind of seventh grade orientation. Instead of going to all their classes, the seventh graders stayed with their first period teacher for the full day of icebreaking games, a tour of the school, an overview of how the schedule works, and an assembly to welcome the new students. 

(I was given the schedule ahead of time, so I knew what was coming.) 

For a first day, things went fairly well. The eighth grader who was leading the group did a fantastic job. (Although, her tour guide skills do need improvement.) I didn't have to jump in too much. 

But then we went to the assembly...

I have made my dislike of assemblies abundantly clear on this blog. The problem with this assembly, though, was more technical. The sound system was so awful that I could barely make out what the presenter was saying. 

I got the gist as when various administrators were introduced, I already knew who they were. However, the students, who are new, wouldn't have figured out what they were talking about. So, they were bored.

Things could have gone worse. The kiddos were on first day best behavior. If they had tried this later in the year...

But what was notable about the assembly (and why I'm writing a blog post about it), was the last game they played. The earlier games were the usual things such as musical chairs (with a race component) and dodge ball. They did a tug of war. There was even a finish the lyric.

They finished the assembly with a game called rock-paper-scissors... tortilla.

I had never heard of this before, but apparently it's a thing. Mr. S, the leadership teacher, and Mr. F, a history teacher (who's also been doing some leadership stuff), faced off in rock-paper-scissors. The winner slapped the loser with a tortilla.

I... Uh...

I'm sure the students would have enjoyed it way more if they were more familiar with Mr. S and Mr. F. But they enjoyed it just fine. I, however, was mystified by the whole thing.

Just when I thought I'd seen everything...

Worst Class Period Ever

Thursday, third period.

Technically, the class was world geography, but the subject makes no difference. It was Great California ShakeOut Day, which I knew in advance (they talked about it on the news and I think I saw a school email about it), so it didn't take me by surprise as it has in other years. 

When I checked in that morning, the secretary mentioned the drill, and I nodded. I knew. Then she mentioned something about an assembly that I didn't need to worry about...

Only, I did. It turned out that Mr. L's third period class is freshmen. (In previous years he taught juniors and seniors. I did not know he had switched to freshmen.) And the freshmen were to go to the assembly third period...

...after the earthquake evacuation drill...

I mean, on the bright side, that meant that technically I didn't have to teach third period. 

Small victory. Especially considering that Mr. L's classes are traditionally not a problem. (He's very, very strict. My biggest issue generally in covering his classes is what to do to stay awake while they're diligently working on whatever busy work assignment he gave them--on this day it was researching six separate holidays celebrated in other countries.) 

We had two minutes in class before it was time for the drill. They ducked and covered. With minimal pushback. Then we evacuated. (Mr. L had helpfully drawn a map on the board so the kiddos knew where we were to meet outside.)

We had heat last week, so they complained of the hot sun. I pointed out that it was only 10 in the morning, and it would be hotter later. (They must complain while we wait to be dismissed from the drill. If it wasn't the heat, they'd find something else.)

When the all-clear bell rang, we headed directly for the gym. (The gym was closer to us than the classroom, so I had told them to go there rather than back to class.) 

And then it was time for the assembly. Yay?

(I do not like assemblies.)

I mean, as far as assemblies go, this one was fine. Rather than the usual sports thing with dancing and weird games (which I got to do the very next day at a different site for their Homecoming), they had a motivational speaker. And he was cool. 

But the benches in the gym are hard. And I'm technically on duty, making sure the kiddos are behaving. In a situation where they are more likely to goof off. 

Sigh.

At least he took until the bell, so when the assembly finished, it was time to go to the next period.

And I was quite happy to sit back and watch period five do busy work in the comfort of the classroom.

Friday Chaos

Some days...

This past week was Homecoming Week. That meant the game was Friday, the dance was Saturday, and there would be an assembly. Ugh!

I hate assemblies... 

(Although, they were calling it a "rally". It was an assembly.)

They shorten the schedule (the good news) so they can fit the gathering into the school day. My fourth period class was the one I would take. They arrived. I quickly took roll. And I told them to leave behind their backpacks as they would be returning to class after. 

They did not like this idea. 

I found out why when the "rally" was over. Four of the students who were there before the "rally" did not return. Deep sigh. 

(Two girls barely made it to the "rally" in the first place. I saw them arrive about ten minutes before it ended.) 

Of course, I reported those cuts to the attendance office. 

The biggest problem with assembly days is how wound up the students get. And I had the even periods (the more difficult day). 

At least the lesson plan was on point. They had independent work to do, so I didn't have to attempt to get their attention when they weren't going to give it.

But just as things had begun to settle in sixth period...

The fire alarm went off.

This wasn't the school where we ignore such things. 

It was about ten minutes before lunch. 

The students questioned a drill at that time. I told them it wasn't a drill. So, we evacuated. 

And we were about halfway out to the staging area when we got the all clear. 

We had a few minutes before lunch, so of course half the class didn't return. And at that point, I didn't blame them. 

At least eighth period went off without a hitch. (Well, except for them watching Dahmer instead of doing the work. And no, they shouldn't be watching that at school which I argued with them, but they ignored me.)

So, the first week of that assignment is done. Only three more to go.

Change of Plans

Last Friday was kind of crazy. It was Homecoming Week. (I'm not sure when this happened, but now it's called HoCo, and there were all sorts of HoCo "promposals" happening all week.) 

There were dress up days. The candidates for king and queen had signs up all over school. Then Friday was the game, and during school hours was the "rally" (read: assembly).

I hate assemblies. I have whined repeatedly on this here blog about how much I hate them. Now, you'd think considering everything that there would be no assembly, but the school has an outdoor football stadium. It was doable.

So, I was ready. I brought sunscreen. I had my sunglasses. I wore my walking shoes. (It's not that far, but it is a bit of a hike to get there.) 

The classes were all shortened. We still had enough time for them to take their unit test with time left over. (And I had students who came to take the test and then leave as they had setting up to do and such.) 

It was the end of fourth period. We were getting ready to go. I had my seating chart, so I told the class where our assigned seats were. (We were up high in the stadium.) I explained that they'd have to leave their backpacks in class (phones would be in pockets, I was sure), but the room would be locked, so their backpacks would be safe.

Then, the announcement came. "Wait." And then a bit later, it was all called off. 

Minutes before things were to start, the school got word. Someone tested positive for Covid. And they were hurriedly contact tracing. 

Considering who had been called out of class, it sounded like the positive case was a football player. 

The game was cancelled, too. The dance? Postponed. 

Deep sigh. 

I mean, who thought it would be a good idea to hold an assembly during a global pandemic, anyway?

Fourth period was stuck in class for another hour. But they had phones and computers, so they kept themselves entertained. (They had already taken a test that day, and nothing else was planned. And they were seniors, so there was no need for crowd control.)

Disappointing (for them), but not surprising, really.

Girl Assembly

The assembly was called "No Girl Left Behind", and it was scheduled for third and fourth periods. I took roll, and the girls all left.

Leaving me with four boys.

Well, it was AP English...

Fourth period was considerably larger. (Third period had 13 students enrolled. Fourth period's total was more like 34.) I had just over a dozen boys.

They were not happy to be missing out on the assembly.

"They're having a rave."

Apparently, the girls were posting to social media, and the boys were following along.

"They're having a concert."

The classroom was steps from the gym, and we could hear it when things got loud, but it wasn't loud at that moment. I said something about the presenters needing to get the girls interested, so it probably wasn't all fun and games.

"I don't know why girls need an assembly anyway. Girls already have full equality."

I'll just let that comment sit there. I didn't at the time. He would not be dissuaded. But he and I have had political conversations in the past. He clings to certain beliefs.

The girls returned half way into fourth period. And their review was that the assembly wasn't all that. Too much marketing happening, they said. The singer was too full of herself. The actors were promoting their stuff too much.

Still, the boys didn't like missing out. The girls didn't like missing class. So, success. No one was happy.

(They're teens. There's always going to be that attitude. If the girls got something out of the assembly, they're probably going to keep it to themselves.)

Whodunit?

Eighth grade English. It was the class that stole my clock. On a Friday. With an assembly scheduled.

Basically, I was doomed from the start.

I had gone over what their assignment was. They were doing the settling in thing, where they get their work out, they figure out what they need to do, and they get started. I turned away for a second (I think I was getting the roll sheet or some housekeeping thing like that), and that's when a sharp "pop" sounded.

And the class reacted to the stink bomb that someone threw.

Chaos ensued. Those closest to the offending smell fled the room. Others complained about the smell. Someone pulled out their perfume and sprayed. (It never fails. There's always someone who does this, and I always go after them as we don't know who might be allergic.)

I called security. (Well, I called the office and they called security...)

Victoria arrived. She got the class back in their seats and told them all to write down on a sheet of paper (without putting their names) what they knew of the incident.

While they were doing this, Anisha warned them not to be "snitches" and say anything.

Whether they listened to Anisha, they didn't know anything, or they just didn't want to say, it's hard to tell. But every single page had a variation of "I know nothing" on it.

Victoria pulled three students from class, one of whom was Anisha.

Upon Anisha's return, she informed the class that one of the boys who had been pulled had "taken the fall" for the incident. Apparently, he had stink bombs in his backpack. But it was clear that Anisha was telling the class it wasn't actually his fault.

I kind of wonder who the culprit is. Although, I was more concerned with getting the class back to some semblance of proper classroom behavior. This did actually occur, but only after several students who couldn't stand the smell fled.

I rather think it was one of them.

Those who remained were nose blind to the smell after a short while. And they know what's coming to them upon their teacher's return. They rather think they deserve whatever is coming.

What is your vice of choice after a particularly hard day? What is one way you tortured the substitute teachers you had in your classes? 

Today's A to Z Challenge post brought to you by the letter...

How Not to Wear a Ribbon

I saw the small bag with the ribbons in them when I arrived in class. The Post-It said I was to pass them out to first period and why. But, being a middle school class, I figured passing the ribbons out at the end of the period would be for the best, so I set it aside.

But then, midway through the period, one of the assistant principals came over the PA to say something about the ribbons. Now the kiddos were clued in to their existence, so against my better judgment, I passed the ribbons out.

These were the standard small lapel pin ribbons that celebrities wear on the red carpet. These ribbons were orange, and they had provided a small pin to attach them to clothing. (Alas, not a safety pin...)

If you know middle schoolers, you know what came next.

They couldn't figure out how to attach the ribbons. I tried to demonstrate, but they were mostly not listening. One girl just had me attach the thing to her shirt.

The boy next to her, however, decided to pin the pin through his finger.

The girl was grossed out. She asked him to take the thing off his finger. Knowing it was bothering her, the boy, of course, now made a bigger deal out of the pin sticking in his finger than he had before.

I'm squeamish. I objected to this display as well. When the boy wouldn't relent, I informed the boy he had now lost the ribbon. He handed it over with minimum fuss.

The rest of the class managed to attach the ribbons to their clothing. One boy put it on his pants. Another put it on his backpack. The other boy who attached it to his finger put the ribbon on something else.

At the end of the period, the boy wanted the ribbon back. They were having an assembly that day, and all the students were encouraged to have them on. I explained that if he attached it again to his flesh, he would lose it completely.

He attached it to the hood of his sweatshirt. Well, I said it had to be on his clothing. So, good enough. He argued that attaching it to his hair would work as well, but I vetoed that idea. And then they left.

Why were ribbons being distributed to the students? They were in honor of the student who passed away over winter break. Cancer. They were honoring her with a moment of silence at the assembly.

A Card in an Orange

Oh, how I hate assemblies. I thought I might get out of this one, but alas, I had to go. It wasn't as bad as some of them--they had a "motivational speaker" who called himself a mentalist--but it was 7th graders only, so I spent most of my time staring down students who were misbehaving.

I wasn't the only one. All the teachers in the gym were busy moving students who would not calm down.

The speaker called for volunteers. In his final bit, he blindfolded a student, blindfolded himself, and then did a card trick. He pulled out a machete and he was going to pick a card out of the air, but the student threw the cards too soon, so when the guy stabbed, he was only stabbing air.

It was pretty funny and probably planned.

I was a bit surprised when that volunteer was in my 5th period class. (I shouldn't have been as the 7th grade isn't that vast.) I had bigger issues to deal with, so I didn't mention that I recognized the boy from the assembly. He brought it up.

The boy told me that he almost got stabbed. I told the boy I was there, and the machete was nowhere near his vicinity at any time. The boy didn't believe me. He claimed that his volunteering was dangerous.

The conversation then turned to an orange. The picked card ended up in an orange that the speaker cut open with that machete. They tried to figure out how the card got in there. He must have inserted the card at some point. But the boy could attest that he had examined the orange and no card marks were on the outside.

Then they all wanted to know: what happened to the orange? They each wanted to eat the orange. The boy asked the speaker if he could have it. And when everyone found out that the orange did not get eaten by anyone, all considered that a huge waste.

7th graders. They go off on the weirdest tangents.

Assembly Fake Out

The marquee in front of the school read, "Homecoming Game Oct. 7". I knew that that meant that they were due an assembly and it would probably be today. Oh no! (In case you didn't know, I hate assemblies.) 

When I checked in, the secretary said nothing. The lesson plans said nothing. I thought I had missed the thing until a student came in to "check in" to 1st period. 

A check in is when a student comes up to me to tell me that he's not going to be in class because (insert reason here). I have to make sure to not mark him absent. 

The student told me that he needed to help set up the assembly. Which meant there was an assembly. I called the secretary to confirm. She did, and she also told me that the 9th and 10th graders were to go 2nd period while the 11th and 12th graders were to go 3rd. 

Now I knew why I didn't get any information about the assembly in the lesson plans. I had 12th graders 2nd period and 9th graders 3rd. I was going to get to miss the thing. I would have done a happy dance, but I had a room full of freshmen, and I never would live that down. 

As 3rd period came in, they informed me that I was supposed to take them to the assembly. They told me their 2nd period teachers hadn't taken them and Mr. W. said that he would. 

Yeah, right. Nice try. 

I got class started. I passed out their assignment. Then, in passing, I asked a couple of them how the assembly was. 

"Boring." 

"It was okay." 

"Wait. We haven't gone." 

Uh huh. Sure. 

Freshmen. Sigh.

Dance Off Aftermath

I celebrated too soon. Sure, I missed the assembly at one school yesterday, but the school I was at today had their assembly today. Sigh.

The assembly was loud and kind of boring, the way they usually are. Towards the end, they had a dance off between the 7th and 8th graders.

There was this one 7th grade boy who was bringing it. He fell on the ground to do some break dancing. He did flips with a running start. I thought I was watching a gymnast for a bit. There were others who were pretty good, but this kid outshone them all.

I have no idea which grade won. It was too loud to hear.

After the assembly was 4th period. I was surprised to find the gymnast boy in my class, along with another notable dancer. I don't think I'll shock anyone by mentioning that they walked into class a bit wound up.

It became my job to mellow them out.

The class had a video. They were to take notes. I insist on silence during videos, and most of the class complied.

Those two boys, however, weren't going to do it. They started by trading insults. Then one boy (not the gymnast) found he had to comment on every thought that went through his head. And there was a third boy who thought this was all very funny (he found subtle ways to keep the other two going).

I managed to get them almost settled...and then it was time for them to go. I haven't been so grateful for lunch in a long time.

Keeping Track of Attendance

"Can you sign permission slips?"

Normally, the answer is no, but today they were having a special assembly second period only for students who had permission. Since I was the teacher for the day, I figured I was authorized to give that permission. (And I was so thrilled that I didn't have to go!)

It was selfish on my part. This was a two-day assignment, so I had already dealt with second period, and it wasn't good. They were watching a movie. I spent much of class time on top of talking students. I figured with a few of them out of the room, I might have a better chance at keeping the class quiet. It turned out I was right.

During the passing period, a few other students came in with their permission slips. I signed all of them. I didn't really keep track. I didn't really need to. When I took roll for second period, I marked them all absent.

I sort of enjoy taking attendance. It's on the computer. They give us subs a temporary password to access the system. I click on the absent button, and poof, absent. I click on submit, and I'm done.

During the next class, after submitting attendance, I went back into second period's roll just to see. Of the nine I had marked absent, four of those "absents" had been replaced with "verified school activity". I guess their permission slips cleared. Then the period after that, the number of "verified school activity" went up to six.

Technology is so cool! It's a little game I play. I like to check back on previous classes to see if the students' absences are verified. Many times, a student I marked absent in first period will later show up as "illness". And later in the day, I'll find that I don't have to mark some students absent as the system will already show them as absent.

Yeah, I'm way too enamored of the attendance taking procedure.

A Crazy Day

I kind of knew it was coming.  When I got the call this morning, I had a feeling that was subbing for a roving teacher.  Turned out I was right.

Several teachers at this one high school don't have their own classrooms.  They must share.  For three periods, they have a "home room".  For the other two, they take over the room of a teacher who has his/her prep that period.  (This is much better than in previous years when these teachers had to travel for every period, but that's another post.)

I went in search of lesson plans.

First, I went to the teacher's first room.  The teacher in there said that he hadn't left lesson plans there.  Also, he told me it was an assembly day.  Oh, great.

Then, I went to the teacher's "home room" where he teaches 4th, 5th, and 6th periods.  No lesson plans there, either.  I found videos, but nothing else.

So, I went back to the secretary.  I asked her if she had gotten the lesson plans emailed.  No.  But she called the department chair, and he had them.  So, I had to trudge to the back far corner of the school to retrieve the plans from him.  (This school is rather large.  I worked up a good sweat walking all over the campus.)

The videos were the lesson plan, so I went back to the teacher's "home room" to get the video I'd need.  1st period had started by now, so I walked in on another teacher's class.  I hate doing that, but I made sure my interruption was as quick as could be.  (They were just getting started, so I didn't actually bother the class.  That made me feel a whole lot better.)

1st period was the prep, so I went back to the teacher's lounge to cool off and relax for a bit.  Once I got 2nd period started, I thought I had had my excitement for the day.  I was dreading the assembly, but other than that...

It was nearly the end of the period when we had the earthquake.  It was pretty mild--a jolt and that was about it--but it was enough to get the mostly freshman class riled up.  (It wasn't like they were really watching the video anyway, but I had been dealing with that.)  They didn't call for an evacuation, and most of the students and teachers we asked later hadn't felt the thing.

It was a relief to get to the assembly.  Really.

The assembly was the typical fall sports deal, with the extra added bonus of them retiring the jersey/number of a former student who made it to the NFL.  It was one of the better assemblies that I've attended, even if the gym was as hot as an oven.  (We're having unseasonably warm temperatures.  It got into the 80s today, but that was a relief as it was hotter yesterday and the day before.)

Then all I had to deal with was wound up students on an assembly Friday with a video as the lesson plan.  I was grateful to work, but boy, am I grateful that this day is over!

Needing More Rehearsal

I kinda knew it was coming.  Remember how I mentioned yesterday that it was homecoming week?  That meant that we were due to have an assembly.

(I hate assemblies.)

We were assigned to the first assembly.  (The school is so large that the entire student body can't fit into the gym at the same time, so they have two assemblies.)  The first assembly usually ends up going longer, mostly because they make all their mistakes in that one.  It's kind of like their dress rehearsal.

At the assembly, they announced the winners of prince and princess of the lower classes.  (This was after they tried to deafen us.  It wasn't so much that the music was loud; it was just that the music hit some tones that hurt.) The plan was brilliant.  They had written the names out on huge rolls of paper, and those rolls were to roll over the crowd in the seats.

Unfortunately, the execution wasn't so brilliant.

Instead of the paper rolling over the crowd, the crowd impeded the progress of the roll, stopping it and crumpling it as it made its way to the gym floor.  They didn't even bother doing this for the junior class prince and princess.  I guess they realized that it wasn't working.

Although, I wonder if it did work in the second assembly.

On the bright side, an assembly meant we were on assembly schedule, meaning that all the classes were just a bit shorter.  At least that made the day fly by.

Assembly

NOOOOO!!!!!!!

I hate assemblies. If I know that one is coming, I will do what I can to avoid that school on that day. But many times I get blindsided by them--like today.

I wasn't the only one blindsided. Several full-time teachers were also confused. I guess the informational email went out late yesterday.

But I was discussing my general dislike of these things. They are generally loud. The students are all wound up, and I can never keep track of my class (more than half will vanish on the walk to the gym). I never know where to sit. I always feel a little out of place. And they're just not that interesting.

Today's assembly was to congratulate the winter sports teams. So, we got to listen to coaches introduce their teams. And they announced the popularity contest winners (the king and queen of the upcoming dance). Whoopee.

Today's exercise was especially painful. It took forever for the students to file into the gym. Then it took a good ten minutes before anything got started. The microphone kept cutting out, and the MC had to switch her microphone at least five times.

I overheard an assistant principal telling a teacher that the whole day was just a mess.

Figures. Mercury is retrograde (for only four more days!).