The Wrong Johnson

Eighth grade US history. Fifth period. 

It's the end of the year, so the eighth graders are on the Civil War and Reconstruction. (Eleventh grade US history starts studying after Reconstruction.) 

As Mr. C was going to be out for a week, he had left them a lot of bookwork to do. They had questions that went along with their textbooks. And many of them were using their textbooks to find the answers.

But nowadays, many students use Google rather than their textbooks. (We've explained to them that Google is way harder as the questions are constructed to go with the text. And Google can go way off topic.) Although, that was before.

Axel had his questions out. And his phone. And he decided that he was going to use ChatGPT instead of his textbook. 

Of course, I told him this was a bad idea.

He input the question. It had something to do with President Johnson and his conflicts with the Congress. 

He read out the answer: "Congress and Lyndon B. Johnson..."

At which point I stopped him. "Wrong Johnson."

As most US history teachers do, Mr. C had the presidents' portraits running along the top of the walls of his classroom. George Washington was at the front on the right wall. Joe Biden was at the front on the left wall. 

I found Lincoln on the wall. I pointed to him. I reminded Axel that they had just studied Lincoln's assassination, and the president following him was right next to him. Then I pointed to LBJ, who was on the opposite wall. 

"Different centuries."

Did that send Axel back to his book? Nah. He refined his question to ChatGPT. 

Sigh.

I made sure that Mr. C knew about how Axel found his answers. If nothing else, at least Axel learned that we had two different President Johnsons. I hope he remembers that.

Not Going Anywhere

The big internet issue has been resolved, but the new company is waaaaay sloooower than the old company, so I'm feeling my way along with this new normal. Ah well... 

Last week was the penultimate week of school, which can be an odd time at the continuation high school. The kiddos are either frantically trying to get those last couple credits finished, or they've given up for the year.

So, rather than fight this, Mr. M gave them a project to work on. They were to plan a backpacking trip through Europe. 14 days. 5 cities. Everything else was open to their choices. They could choose which cities, how long to stay in each city, and what they wanted to do there. And they needed to figure out how much it would cost.

They were to submit (online) a Google map with their cities marked. They had to do a write up of what they'd see. It would entail a lot of research online (and not a lot of lecture from the teacher).

Cool assignment, right?

Mr. M warned me some weren't doing it. Which is normal for the continuation high school.

One boy, who had done no work all period, claimed he was already done. (They had been working on it for a couple days already.)

Me: Okay, cool. Where are you going?

Boy: To Europe.

Me: Yes, I know. Which five cities did you choose?

Boy: Ones in Europe.

Me: Which ones?

Boy: Um... France.

Ahem.

On the one hand, I wasn't surprised that he hadn't done the assignment. They frequently claim they're done when, in fact, they haven't even started. But I did expect a better bluff. I mean, can't you just name five random European cities off the top of your head?

This was a geography class... (Well, and world history, depending on the period.)

So, quiz time. In the comments, name five random European cities. I won't even ask you to list the five you'd visit if you were planning a trip.

Not Quite the Pithy Retort

The 9th graders (same group as yesterday) had a test on the story today. My instructions were to read through the test with them. I got to the last two questions which were vocabulary questions. "Write a sentence using retort correctly."

"What does retort mean?"

Yeah, like I've never heard that one before (although, it's usually during spelling tests). I ignored the question.

Another student asked me again. So, I had to explain that I was ignoring the question. That was the point of the question. Sigh.

Perhaps I should have answered. Because clearly, many of them did not know what retort means. I have examples:

• My mom retort to the living room to clean.
• I was watching a movie and they keep saying retorted words to each other.
• I retorted as fast as I can from a dog that was chasing me.
• Her retort broke yesterday.
• She moved to the next seat and determined the retort of the game.

There's more. Rather than clutter this post with them all, I'll tweet them later (@ZiziRho). The other word they had to put in a sentence was benevolently. Apparently, some of them thought this was a description of a smell.  

Once all the tests were turned in, I asked if anyone could define the words. Depending on the class, I either got a good answer or I had to provide the answer. At least some of them had actually studied and knew the material.  

Read the Question Carefully

Today I had the same class as yesterday.  (The teacher's wife went into labor on Thursday.  He might be out for a few days.)

I didn't mention it yesterday, but besides criminalistics, this teacher teaches physics.  Since each high school only has one physics teacher, and that teacher only has a couple periods of physics, I rarely get to sub for them.  This is a treat for me.

Today, all classes had a short quiz.  It was 10 questions long and multiple choice.  It took them roughly five minutes to finish.

I glanced over the quiz, just to see if I knew the material.  I did.  But it wasn't until I collected all the quizzes and got them started on the rest of their assignment that I got a chance to really look at the quiz.  I wouldn't have, but one of the students mentioned something.  She asked if Mr. M. had given them a trick question.

I read the question and laughed.  He had.  He had given them a trick question.

I didn't write it down, so I'm paraphrasing, but the gist is the same: "A person walks 5 miles east, then 3 miles west. After returning to the starting point, what is the person's total displacement?"

Get it?  After returning to the STARTING POINT!  Displacement?  Zero.

I said that that was just like the old joke: "If a plane crashes on the border between the US and Mexico, where would you bury the survivors?"

Another girl didn't get it, but the first girl explained.  Then she explained the quiz's trick question.  The second girl had gotten it wrong.  Then someone said that the whole class was going to be upset when they got their quizzes back.  Mr. M. shouldn't have tricked them like that.

The next period had the same quiz.  This time, as I was sorting answer sheets from quizzes, I noticed the answers to that question.  75% of the class got it wrong.

I thought about mentioning this to the class, but then I decided against.  If they didn't notice it, I wasn't going to bring it to their attention.

Medical Misunderstanding

I've got one last story from the opportunity class before I go back to my regularly scheduled summer.  (Well, at least I think this will be the last story.)  I think this happened on Wednesday, but the week is already getting a little fuzzy.

It was later in the day (Santiago's last hour). The students were busy ignoring their assignments.  Gilberto had a question for me: "What's the name of that disease where your blood turns into water?"

I had never heard of such a thing, and I said so.  Gilberto asked what blood diseases I had heard of, and I listed two.  Nope, these weren't it.  I said that I didn't think there was such a thing as what Gilberto described, but, "I'm not a medical expert.  I may never have heard of it."

Gilberto started laughing.  He was saying and doing things that I did not quite understand.  Then I figured out what it was he was referencing.  When I said medical, he heard medical marijuana, and he was reacting as such.

I attempted to explain that the word medical has nothing to do with illegal drugs (generally).  But he was having none of it.  Apparently, I had admitted to...  I'm not sure what I had admitted to.  There was a not in my sentence.

But these kids hear what they want to hear.  And when they don't understand, they make assumptions, and no amount of explanation will dissuade them from the conclusion they jumped to (often over distances as vast as the Grand Canyon).

Every time I used medical after that, I was greeted with fits of laughter.  They mimicked...well, you know.  However, soon enough the conversation drifted onto something else.

Did they get any work done?  Of course not.

Which State?

The class: environmental science. The section: climate change.

It's day three of a three-day assignment. For the most part, the students have been on task. At the beginning of each period I tell them that if they get stuck, need help, or need a tie-breaker, I am available. But most of the time, I have to insert myself into the conversation when I hear students having difficulty.

I heard two students debating, so I went to investigate. They were looking at a map. The caption read: "As sea level rises, shorelines could shift inland many miles." The question: "Which two states would lose the most area if sea level were to rise by 3 m?"

The map had shaded area that would be under water if the sea level were to rise. Unfortunately, the map did not have any states labeled.

One student wanted to write Miami. The other student pointed out that Miami is not a state. This is where I entered the conversation. I agreed that Miami is not a state.

The one student had written Miami and New Orleans. He knew that Miami was in Florida, but he did not know which state New Orleans was in. Once I hinted that the name started with an L, he got it.

Now I was curious how the rest of the class tackled this question (as no one else had asked me for help). I found some interesting answers. For those that got it right, I had all sorts of interesting spellings of Louisiana. Florida they could spell. I got Florida and New Orleans. I got Miami and Houston. And I also got the United States and Mexico. Huh?

I don't think that they're stupid, necessarily. I think many just rushed through the assignment. For most frequently, that question was just skipped.